Early in my career of "people work," someone put me on to Gordon MacDonald's practical book, Ordering Your Private World (Thomas Nelson, 2007). It's now been revised--but it's every bit as helpful as it was back in the mid-80's. With thoughtful insights from a veteran pastor, MacDonald weaves together principles for staying spiritually fresh, well-organized, and faithful in living out one's call to serve others.

His five "sectors" include Motivation, Use of time, Wisdom & knowledge, Spritual strength, and Restoration. Each chapter begins with a pithy "Memo to the Disorganized" that helps summarize in one sentence the thrust of the following section.

Even after all these years, I read this book through at the beginning of every year!

To Comfort and to Honor is one of the most practical guides around to help a family make memorial plans. Of course, those who know me know that I think the body's presence at the funeral service is pretty essential, and this guide uses much more leeway on that question than I advise. Nonetheless, this is a must-have for chaplains, pastors, and families, especially if the family is connected to mainline Protestant faith.

In The Hidden Face of God: Finding the Missing Door to the Father Through Lament (NavPress, 2007), Christian musician Michael Card has created a masterful work for people grappling with the "God who doesn't make sense" and the Church from which they feel so alien. Beginning with the tormented life ov Vincent Van Gogh, Card writes, "...there have never been so many Vincents in our time, men and women who find themselves standing outside a church with no door, tormented by the possibility that no one could be waiting inside for them. According to their fragmented vision, the only possible solution is to work harder, get busy, and take control." Here is a book that resonates with many bereaved people who feel "shut out" from a relationship with God.

Planning the Catholic Funeral is a great guide for families to use in preparing for vigil, funeral liturgy, and Rite of Committal. Written by Fr. Terrence Curley, the workbook includes places to record wishes and many suggestions for scripture readings and music in keeping with the Church's faith and customs. Especially useful for the family that wants to arrange a Catholic funeral but desires to do some planning in advance (or perhaps before meeting with the priest and/or funeral director), this little workbook is outstanding.

In late 2009, I embarked on an effort to read through the books widely regarded to be the very best books ever published. Now of course, various lists of "great texts" are marked by some differences, to be sure. But there are some books sure to be on any list!

The first of these--that I probably read in college but remember nothing from--is Niccolo Machiavelli's little treatise, The Prince (various publishers and reprint dates).

In a world filled with political turmoil and intrigue, Machiavelli's work holds out the hope for a virtuous prince whose decisions are made with more concern for his subjects than his own self-interest. 

Ethical Practice in Grief Counseling (Springer, 2009) by Louis Gamino and Hal Ritter is a great contribution to our field in an arena where little has been written. Though at this writing, I'm not all the way through the volume, I am finding the treatment on multiple relationships to be extremely helpful, mostly because that is such a huge issue in grief counseling.

In addition to the chapter on multiple relationships, readers will also find help in the chapters on internet grief counseling, pitfalls of public service (like mass casualty disasters), and forensic roles (expert witness and other legal consultation).

George Bonanno turns some of our conventional thinking about bereavement on its head. And frankly, it's certainly time to turn some of that thinking upside down! While not dismissing some very severe ways people respond to loss, creating a host of pathologies, Bonanno suggests that for most people, the natural resiliency of humans mitigates against reactions to loss that remain unremittlingly disabling.

With good support and a healthy dose of encouragement that "we can get through this," seems to be the basic thesis of this book. George Bonanno's thoughtful and carefully researched book, The Other Side of Sadness (Basic, 2009) provides a lighthouse for grieving people, allowing them to find restored hope that there really is life after loss.

Contrary to some "professional opinions" you'll read, this is NOT the only book you need to read about bereavement. But it certainly demands a careful examination, especially by those of us who work in this field professionally.